Linda Lee, Revisited

The below is an in-universe bit of background explanation as might be given by one Linda Lee, Black Spiral Dancer Kinfolk and eventual Fomor. Linda was the character that I brought in to New Bremen on the first day of that long-dead moderated chat game back in April of 2000. It’s been ten years now, and I felt like revisiting her. Note that there are some modifications here to accommodate using her again – in the original chat game, she did not escape the Garou, and in fact deliberately allowed them to kill her. Anyhow, on to a transcript of Linda’s own words:

Linda2

“As I am now I was not always…but even so I am now…or rather we are, Jez and I. Yes…we are.

Once… I had value. Once… I was me. Before I was We. No I didn’t, why am I lying to you?

It started out bad… I, not we…started out living in a filthy little slum, classic white-trash, with relatives that did whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted to do it. To me. It gnawed a little hole in me. I’m sure it did.

I survived. It gnawed a little hole in me, I think though. That’s got to be it. My Cousins, they were…or rather we called them.

He was my first cousin, he actually was… he was large, he was strong…and he liked to do what they all did to me, but more so.  I was a skinny, malnourished thing but he was young too then. The day I realized I was going to have his baby, it gnawed a little hole in me. At least, I think she was his. The other cousins might have… but never mind.

Linda_Gorm2

I was fourteen the day my little girl was born… my Krissy. I survived it, though I was too little and scrawny to really have her… I’ve still never gotten over it, quite. And yet I survived. It gnawed another little hole in me.

But having her there with me for those few days… it was the only thing that filled the little holes up without making me feel sick. She was mine.. I could love her… So they took her away, told me I was to be her older sister, mum and dad her parents… and that…that gnawed a little bigger hole in me.

I would happily die for her. Especially if I could take She. Yes… We could die for her…and that would be good.

We would kill for her too. Oh yes we would. No matter what She says.

I did what they wanted, I sold the stuff they wanted me to sell, I fetched them the things they wanted fetched…they were my family, after all… and I tried to just close my eyes when they would come for me, and try not to wake her up by screaming. That gnawed another little hole in me.

I learned computers, and I learned to program. I had a gift. It was something special. It gave me a little more value.

They didn’t like boys being around me, ones that weren’t in the family. Ones that didn’t speak the old language. Ones that didn’t hate me. They dismembered a couple I became friends with. In front of my eyes. That gnawed another little hole in me. That little hole started to grow.

But I met a man. A nice one. They didn’t like that. He knew magic, and he helped me quit heroin. He wanted me to be free.

Lindacoat

They decided I had to learn a lesson. They taught me good. I couldn’t move for a week… that gnawed another little hole in me… I thought it was just another beating, another violation… another rape. It wasn’t. So many little holes got gnawed in me that they made a great big hole right in the middle of me. She liked that. It was just right for her. They let her know about it too… She thought it was a nice hole…a perfect, warm and snuggly one…perfect for her to curl up inside of. Me was killed that day, I guess… at least me hasn’t been alone since…

Ever since then, I’ve been We.

I was scared. We were supposed to die after She joined with Me. The Big one like my cousins…they thought he would do my cousins’ work for them… he tried.  I think even She was scared, but I can’t be sure… The boy showed up then, and he sent me far away with his magic.

LinFight2

She made me fast, She taught me to use the gift I had…the link. The Beyond. I ran, and have never stopped.

She tried to get me to go back… but I couldn’t find my Krissy…

That little hole is filled now… Jez is there. and wherever I go…there We are.

Sometimes I still try to pray that I’ll find my Krissy… when the Beyond doesn’t call.

So We continue till we die. Will I be me even then, or still We?

And now we are here. If only I was just me, not We.”

LindaKrissy3Linda 1

I also made a pair of gaia avatars of her BSD cousin Gorm, who was the tribe member with whom she had the most dealings, and who was the primary architect of her fomorization.

Dream AvatarDream Avatar

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